Why Not?

As a result of the Great Shift, Jeff suddenly found himself in a nice suburban backyard. He saw a handsome man next to him, and he quickly discovered he was female. He knew it would sound crazy, but he had to ask.

“Are you also someone else’s body?” He questioned the man.

“Yeah,” The man replied, “Do you think we’re married? I mean, not you and I, obviously, I mean, like, these bodies?”

“Probably.”

“I was single before this -- a bit of a geeky guy, to be honest, so this is an improvement.”

“Well, you’re quite attractive now,” Before quickly adding, “Not that I’m gay like that. I was a guy before, too. I played football in high school -- not quite good enough to be on a team when I went to college.” Jeff realized he felt the need to prove his masculinity despite having a body that was clarly attracted to her own husband.

“I mean, it’s technically not gay NOW, is it? And even if it was, who cares? Would it even be a big deal if these bodies were married?”

“Are you suggesting we...? No, I can’t...we can’t...can we?”

“Why not?”

Performance Art

Upon entering the modern art museum, there was a sign up to participate in a piece of performance art. Most people seemed to ignore it, a few commented that a blank sign up form was a genius art piece in itself. Liam decided to be bold and actually sign himself up.

He didn’t think much about it as he walked through the halls, looking at the various abstract paintings and sculptures. When he finally entered a room with an installation made of lights, he felt woozy; within seconds, he was passed out on the floor.

He awoke on a stage with more of the installation of lights around him. He could whispers of curiosity from a crowd that had gathered, hearing comments about “his reaction” and something about “gender.” As he began to pick himself up he could feel heavy heeled shoes on his feet and a tight constricting dress on his body. At first, he thought the performance art piece had dressed him up as a woman. But it took only a few more moments to realize it was much more extreme than that -- he had actually become a woman!

It only continued to get more surreal as his own body walked out on stage, speaking of the gender disparity in the arts, about how the performance art piece had been funded, and how more funding was anticipated now that “she” was in a man’s body. He had swapped bodies with the artist? And it didn’t sound like she was planning to give him his body back...

Hopes Dashed (Part 2)

View Part 1 of Hopes Dashed.

Returning home to my own wife while now in Marla’s body was awkward. I think the only thing I said the entire first day was, “There was an accident at work,” and I left it at that.

I don’t think either of us really wanted to talk about it, and for a few days we didn’t. We didn’t even say a single word to each other. We both went off to our jobs and came home to eat in silence. I think by the time the weekend rolled around, we both realized we had to deal with the discomfort, but it was my wife who spoke up first.

“I don’t think I’m a lesbian. I don’t think I can become a lesbian either,” she told me softly.

I knew what she was trying to say. And if I was honest, Marla’s hormones were affecting me in a similar way. I couldn’t even find my own wife attractive in the way I had before the swap. It certainly blunted my own good news, which is that my company has estimated the time before we’d all have our own bodies back from “never” to “ten to fifteen years.” I wondered if I should even bother sharing the information. We couldn’t exactly just pause our relationship for a decade, and it’d be hard spending that much time with someone you weren’t attracted too. And then there was the idea of kids, which we had both wanted, but in ten years, we’d be in our forties.

I sighed, “We’re breaking up, aren’t we?”

My wife nodded.

Hard Sell

Richard picked up the latest phone at the store. It was one of those newer models that bragged about embedding AI in the software. He scrolled through a few apps labeled things like “voice changer” and “head swap,” but despite navigating around in them, it didn’t feel like they were doing anything. He shrugged it off, chalking it up to the fact that the phone was probably just a demo.

Just as he was about to put down the phone, a clerk arrived. “Can I help you with anything today?” The clerk asked.

“No, thanks. I’m just browsing,” Richard cleared his throat. His voice sounded strange, higher pitched and just wrong. He spoke again, “Just browsing.” There was nothing he could do to fix it. He tried coughing again, lifting his hands as he did. And that’s when he got a look of his hands.

They were soft, dainty, and feminine. In fact, his entire body had become so. He quickly scrolled to the phone’s camera app to get a better look at himself. His head was now somehow attached to a woman’s body! He tried to open the apps back up, but they now appeared to be locked.

“If you want to unlock the full features, like reversals, you have to pay for the full versions of the software...and the phone itself, of course.” The clerk explained.

Richard wasn’t sure he had a choice as he prepared to pull out his credit card. But his wallet was in the back pocket of his pants, and now he had someone else’s body with a short black skirt -- and absolutely no pockets!

The Jackalope (Part 3)

View Part 1 of The Jackalope.

View Part 2 of The Jackalope.

“We should be out there with Heather and Angela looking for that damned thing!” Cody demanded.

“You can barely walk across the room wearing her boots, how do you think you’ll manage in a foot of snow?” Trey retorted, “I’m pretty sure Angela would kill you if you sprained her ankle or broke her leg or anything like that.”

“All of her boots have heels! She brought several dresses! And the ski suits certainly prioritize fashion over practicality. Did she not know we were going to SKI on a SKI TRIP!?”

“That’s just sort of who Angela is.”

Cody shook his head, “What the hell do you see in her, man?”

“Well, for starters, look in a mirror.” Trey smirked.

“I get that she’s hot. Your last four girlfriends have all been smokin’ hot. But you never have anything in common with any of them.”

“What can I say though? For whatever reason, I love her. And the only reason I’m not helping her and Heather look for that jackalope is because she was so sure that if you were left here by yourself that you’d go off searching and probably push Angela’s body too hard. I’d prefer it if you didn’t get yourself -- or Angela’s body -- killed simply because her body’s not used to exerting itself the way you are. I mean, I get that you and Heather think she’s shallow, but she can actually read people pretty accurately -- even if she is sometimes rude about it.”